Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Growing Up...

“Happy Mummy’s Day, Mom”, my little girl held out a cute doddle of supposedly me on the bright orange paper. I was so overwhelmed and so thankful that I have such beautiful people who inspire me to be a better person every day. If not for anyone, I will strive to be better mommy, and better person, for that matter, for my little girl, who has taught me so much more than I did to her. Through her, I grew up too, my thoughts widened and my perspective increased. In the process of teaching her what is right and what is not, and by answering to her innocent questions, I molded myself into someone better than I used to be. And when I see my girl growing up little by little and by the way she takes in world, I think I am doing better job as a mother, though I doubt myself  lot sometimes. We (my dear husband and I) have never resorted to spanking her as a solution for something she does wrong. In fact, we appreciated her for speaking out the truth, even when she thought what she did, was something scary. This way, it has helped me with my patience and temper, it helped me understand more that not all people have similar thoughts and that every person has different feelings of what is right and wrong.
We tell her that it is alright to say sorry even when you are not at wrong and if that makes someone feel better. By doing so, it helped me forgive more people who have had hurt me or my parents or my siblings. It has made me feel so much better by freeing my heart from remorse feelings. Everyone have their reasons for having done whatever they did. I hope that they made right decisions at that moment.
When I told my little girl that we should appreciate what ever little we have, I have thought of all the people who have lesser than us and learned the happiness in giving and sharing. I am not saying that I am a perfect mother; I do have days when I feel I am not doing it well. I do cry, at night when my little girl is asleep near me and think about times I have made her cross and cry, unintentionally, and I do need constant encouragement from my dear husband that I am doing it quite well. I complain about myself to my dear husband “I am the worst mother”. However, I have come to realize that when it comes to loving your child, no matter how much you love them and care them, you still feel it is not enough and that it is quite normal to feel distress at yourself when you make them feel upset.
I smile as I conclude my musing and think about this little cute incidence with my girl:
It was a quiet evening and I was giving bath to my girl. She complained that her friend pushed and she bruised her elbow and that it was hurting when I poured water on it. I was like “how did it happen and did you inform your teacher that your friend pushed you”? She meekly answered “no Mom, I didn’t inform my teacher because she would scold my friend. And He didn’t push me on purpose, it was an accident”. I could not be prouder as my eyes welled up.  

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